"Revenons-en à moi, ça m'intéresse plus"
- Marie-Pier Gagnon Nadeau

"Pourtant, il est loin d'être retardé, lui. Il est né à 27 semaines"
- Valérie Lemay

"C'est la cerise qui fait déborder le sundae."
- Hélène Tremblay

"Gatineau est à New-York ce que la rose est au pissenlit!"
-Gros Dave

"Pour bien patiner, faut garder au moins un patin à terre!"
-Jean-François Jauvin

"C'est pas l'endroit qui compte, c'est l'emplacement."
- Buzpopman (soupir)

"I will live forever or die trying"
-Jean-François Jauvin

"Ton trou en arrière, y'é vraiment agréable!"
-Jean-Philippe Gravel
(S'adressant à un garçon dont je préfère garder l'anonymat)

"J'ai des trous dans le cerveau."
- Nathalie Poirier

"Quand les mots n'existent pas, il faut les inventer"
- Genevieve Roberge

"Il ne faudrait pas mettre la peau de l'ours devant la charrue"
- Jean Perron

"Few people understand the psychology of dealing with a highway traffic cop. Your normal speeder will panic and immediately pull over to the side. This is wrong. It arouses contempt in the cop-heart. Make the bastard chase you. He will follow."
- Raoul Duke

"Someone asked me what my sexual orientation was, and I said the first thing that came to my mind. 'When I have a hard on I’ll fuck anything', I said, 'even a telephone pole. I’d fuck a beaver.'"
- Jean-Claude Lauzon (cinéaste québécois qui est décédé avec Marie-Soleil Tougars)

"I wanted to be an old man when I was a little kid. Wore my granddaddy’s hat, used his cane and lowered my voice. I was dying to be old."
- Tom Waits

"C'est la goutte d'eau qui a mis le feu au poudre"
- Jean Perron

"Even a broken clock is right twice a day"
- anonyme

"On apprend pas à un vieux singe à grimper dins rideaux!"
- Jean Perron (dicton à la Gen)

"Vous savez, les baby-boomers sont de plus en plus nombreux dans notre société."
- Louise-Andrée Saulnier (animatrice de Sexe et confidence)

"Quand j'étais jeune, j'étais très con. Je suis resté très jeune."
- Jean-Claude Van Damme

"Oui, j'vous l'accorde, y'a compté un but mais y l'a fait su'l'coin d'une gosse!"
- Jean Perron

"Une guitare avec trop de volume, c'est comme la lutte sumo: il y a trop de graisse. Moi, je préfère le volley-ball."
- Jean Leloup

"Moi, j'suis unanime la d'sus!"
- Jean Perron

"I put instant coffee in my microwave oven and almost went back in time. "
- Steve Wright

"Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?"
- Steve Wright

"Une noisette, j'la casse entre mes fesses tu vois... "
- Jean-Claude Van Damme

"I bought a house, on a one-way dead-end road; I don't know how I got there. "
- Steve Wright

"We are at a very serious moment dealing with very serious issues and we are not focusing on the name you give to potatoes"
- Nathalie Loiseau (porte-parole de l'embassade française aux É-U en réponse à Bob Ney qui a fait changé le nom des "french fries" pour "freedom fries")

"C'est échanger 4 trente sous pour 4 piastres!"
- Jean Perron (dicton à la Gen)

"Snowmen come from heaven... unassembled."
- Anonyme

"I bought some powdered water, but I didn't know what to add."
- Steve Wright

"How am I supposed to hallucinate with all these crazy colors swirling around?"
- Lisa Simpsons

"You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is."
- Ellen DeGeneres

"Fat tony is a cancer on this fair city. He is the cancer and I am... uh... what cures cancer?"
- Chief Wiggum

"La longueur d'un film devrait être directement relié à l'endurance de la vessie humaine."
- Alfred Hitchcock

"Outside of a dog, a book is your best friend, and inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
- Groucho Marx

"Cinq jours qu'on ne nous a pas nourris ni changés d'eau. Albert me regarde avec appétit. Poisson rouge! Poisson rouge! May day! May day! Trop tard. Crounch!"
- Daniel Bélanger

" Un journal coupé en morceaux n'intéresse aucune femme, alors qu'une femme coupée en morceaux intéresse tous les journaux."
- Tristan Bernard

"La superstition porte malchance."
- Raymond Smullyan

"If a beaver two feet long with a tail a foot and a half long can build a dam twelve feet high and six feet wide in two days, all you would need to build Boulder Dam is a beaver 68 feet long with a 51 foot tail."
- The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster

"Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff."
- Steven Wright

"Il ne faut jamais se laisser abattre."
- John F Kennedy

"Early to rise, early to bed, makes a man healthy but socially dead."
- Anamaniacs

"Who ever thought up the word 'Mammogram'? Every time I hear it, I think I'm supposed to put my breast in an envelope and send it to someone."
- Jan King

"Les pommes de terre cuites sont tellement plus faciles a digérer que les pommes en terre cuite !"
- Alphonse Allais

"Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place."
- Johnny Carson

"Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something."
- Westley (Dans le film "The princess bride")

"The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with."
- Marty Feldman

"We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture."
- Robin Williams

"Il est très curieux de constater que dans l'armée, les statistiques le prouvent, la mortalité augmente bizarrement en temps de guerre."
- Alphonse Allais

"Father of 41 children must get vasectomy or go to jail."
- Duane Hanson
(headline d'un journal sur une des ses oeuvres)

"Into everyone's life, a little rain must fall, but this is ridiculous."
- Noah

"Si les hommes deviennent chauves, c'est à cause de leur intense activité cérébrale. C'est la même raison pour laquelle les femmes n'ont pas de barbe."
- Chauve anonyme

"Dieu est impitoyable, il vous enlève les poils de la tête pour vous les mettre dans les oreilles."
- Bruce Willis

"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
- J. Danforth Quayle (ancien vice-président américain, 5 Septembre 1990)

"I will not write subliminAL messaGOREs"
- Bart Simpsons (copie sur le tableau)

"Trying is just the first step towards failure."
- Homer Simpsons

Nice Parachute, never Opened, used once. Slightly Stained"
- (annonce classée)

"Success is often achieved by those who don't know that failure is inevitable."
- Coco Channel

"Oh, they have the internet on computers now..."
- Homer Simpsons

"There's only two kinds of people in this world, the people who sit around smoking heroin all day, and the kids who love Star Wars. I prefer the kids who love Star Wars."
- Beck

"Computers let you make more mistakes faster than anything except handguns and tequila..."
- Mitch Ratcliffe

"Never argue with a fool: they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience"
- Quelquepart sur Battle.net

"I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets."
- Dave Edison

" I have never let schooling interfer with my education"
- Mark Twain

"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country."
- Marion Barry (maire de Washington)

"We have only one person to blame, and that's each other."
- Barry Beck (joueur des Rangers de New York à propos de qui a parti la bagarre entre lui et son opposant)

"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body."
- Winston Bennett (joueur avant de l'équipe de Basketball de l'Université du Kentucky)

"I believe that mink are raised for being turned into fur coats and if we didn't wear fur coats those little animals would never have been born. So is it better not to have been born or to have lived for a year or two to have been turned into a fur coat? I don't know."
- Barbi Benton (playmate de Playboy)

"Ninety percent of the game is half mental."
- Yogi Berra

"No wonder nobody comes here: it's too crowded."
- Yogi Berra

"You can observe a lot by watching."
- Yogi Berra

"You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there."
- Yogi Berra

"Sure, it's going to kill a lot of people, but they may be dying of something else anyway."
- Othal Brand (membre du Texas pesticide review board)

"In the early sixties, we were strong, we were virulent..."
- John Connally (Secrétaire du Trésor sous Richard Nixon dans un speech, tel que reporté dans un "American Scholar")

"They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, Oh my God, I have to be so brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind."
- Cindy Crawford

"There are not enough Indians in the world to defeat the Seventh Cavalry."
- George Armstrong Custer

"He didn't say that. He was reading what was given to him in a speech."
- Richard Darman (directeur du OMB, expliquant pourquoi le Président Bush ne suivait plus sa promesse qu'il n'y aurait plus de perte des wetlands)

"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law."
- David Dinkins (maire de New York, répondant aux accusions de ne pas avoir payer ses taxes)

"Tear open packet, unfold and use."
- Instructions sur un paquet de serviette humide


Petite note en passant: J'adore les instructions stupides sur les divers objets de consommation! Ne vous génez pas de m'en envoyer! (buzpopman@caramail.com")


"They gave me a book of checks. They didn't ask for any deposits.>
- Joe Early (Député, à une conference de presse pour répondre aux questions à propos du scandale du House Bank)

"Things are more like they are now than they ever were before."
- Dwight D. Eisenhower (président des États-Unis)

"If I tell a lie it's only because I think I'm telling the truth."
- Phil Gaglardi (Ministre des transports de la Colombie-Britannique)

"Gentlemen, it is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football."
- John Heisman

"It depends on your definition of asleep. They were not stretched out. They had their eyes closed. They were seated at their desks with their heads in a nodding position."
- John Hogan (Superviseur des nouvelles du Commonwealth Edison, repondant aux charges de la commission des Régulations Nucléaires que deux opérateirs du Dresden Nuclear Plant dormait sur la job)

"Because modeling is lucrative, I'm able to save up and be more particular about the acting roles I take."
- Kathy Ireland (star de 'Alien From L.A.' et 'Danger Island')

"Well, I think that it's a - it's had some difficult times but I think we have - we, I think, have been able to make some very good progress and it's - I would say that it's - it's - it's delightful that we're able to- to share the time and the relationship that we - that we do share."
- Edward Kennedy (Sénateur américain, pendant une entrevue avec Roger Mudd tentant de répondre à la question "Quel est l'état de votre mariage?")

"I'm for abolishing and doing away with redundancy."
- J. Curtis McKay (Wisconsin State Elections Board)

Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Réponse: I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever.
- Miss Alabam lors du concours de Miss Universe 1994

"When you don't know that you don't know, it's a lot different than when you do know that you don't know. He knows now that he doesn't know. Last year, he didn't know that."
- Bill Parcels (Coach des New England Patriots, en parlant de Drew Bledsoe, quarter-back à sa deuxième année)

"I was a pilot flying an airplane and it just so happened that where I was flying made what I was doing spying."
- Francis Gary Power (pilote de U-2 retenu par les Soviétiques pour espionnage, dans une entrevue à son retour aux États-Unis)

"I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and members of the Senate."
- Dan Quayle (ancien vice-Président)

"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history...this century's history.... We all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century."
- Dan Quayle (Sénateur s'ayant fait demandé son opinion sur l'holocaust en entrevue)

"The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make them unsafe."
- Frank Rizzo (ex-chef de police et maire de Philadelphie)

"I'm not indecisive. Am I indecisive?"
- Jim Scheibel (maire de St-Paul au Minessota)

"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."
- Brooke Shields (pendant une entrevue pour devenir représentante de la campagne anti-tabac)

"I cannot imagine any condition which would cause this ship to founder. Modern shipbuilding has gone beyond that."
- E. I. Smith (capitaine du Titanic)

"After finding no qualified candidates for the position of principal, the school board is extremely pleased to announce the appointment of David Steele to the post."
- Philip Streifer (Commissaire d'école du Rhode Island)

"I've always thought that underpopulated countries in Africa are vastly underpolluted."
- Lawrence Summers (chef economique de la World Bank, expliquant pourquoi il supporte l'exportation de déchet toxiques dans les pays du tier-monde)

"We didn't send you to Washington to make intelligent decisions. We sent you to represent us."
- Kent York (Baptist minister to US Rep. Bill Sarpalius)

"Nous découvrons difficilement l'incompatibilité entre l'économie et la culture; il faut choisir entre ceux qui veulent compter leur or et ceux qui veulent conter leur rêve."
- Henri Gobard  La guerre culturelle: logique du désastre

"The record industry is reaping its bad karma for repackaging music in a crap Cd format and destroyng vinyl, getting away with charging too much for too long, as well as buying the sources of distribution and trying to sow the whole thing up completely. the loosers for too long have been the listener, there have been some benefits in reissues and etc but the money the majors made out of it all merits the sprawling abuse of copyright that they will never completely be able to control over then net. tchocky"
- Thom Yorke (chanteur de Radiohead) en rapport avec Napster

"...people would like to think that there's somebody up there who knows what he's doing. Since we don't participate , we don't control and we don't even think about questions of vital importance. We hope somebody is paying attention who has some competence. Let's hope the ship has a captain, in other words, since we're not taking part in what's going on... It is an important feature of the ideological system to impose on people the feeling that they really are incompetent to deal with these complex and important issues: they'd better leave it to the captain. One device is to develop a star system, an array of figures who are often media creations or creations of the academic propaganda establishment, whose deep insights we are supposed to admire the right to control our lives and to control international affairs..."
- Noam Chomsky - The Chomsky reader


"November has tied me to an old dead tree
Send word to april to rescue me"
-Tom Waits - November


"La psychiatrie est la science du déséquilibre individuel encadré dans une société impeccable. Elle valorise le conformisme, celui qui s'intègre et non celui qui refuse; elle glorifie tous les comportements d'obéissance civile et d'acceptation. Ce n'est pas seulement la solitude que je combats ici, mais cet emprisonnement clinique qui conteste ma validité révolutionnaire."
Hubert Aquin - Prochain épisode